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I make no bones about the fact that I'm submissive in my marriage for the very same reason that I'm one tough cookie to the rest of the world: I was an abused kid, and much of my emotional furniture is arranged to make damn sure that nobody ever messes with me again. Being under the protection and providence of a man who is capable of securing not only my happiness, but also my physical and economic safety, is simply the greatest peace I've ever known.

by Aurora on 2006 Mar 23 - 05:47 | reply to this comment
Unfortunate but true
True. Violence, sex and attraction run together. Especially where the violence is centered around self-defense and defense of a woman.

In my days in Boston I got into exactly one fight. It was unremarkable. A drunk 130 lb guy itching for a fight picked on me for no other reason than I was being an introvert, my head down and my shoulders a little slouched after a particularly hard day. Well -- I was a ripped 198 lb back then and I squashed him flat as a pancake. Never start something but always finish it I say. And then I returned to having my head down, shoulders slouched and my drink. We are what we are. I'm a nerd and a lone wolf.

Wouldn't you know that ten minutes later two women sat down at my little table, and a little later, her friend satisfied I wasn't some pyscho, left. The attention perked me up a bit, I did all the right things, and spent an enjoyable night at her place.

It was one of the few times in my entire life where I was approached by the opposite sex, and for all intents, seduced. There is also no question what the trigger for the whole thing was.


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